April 21, 2016
I see a blue rhino’s eye… ET phone home… Blue…
— Lily falling asleep
April 20, 2016
And he’s looking as optimistic as ever.
— Lily on the blue jay sitting in his nest in the tree outside our bathroom window
April 19, 2016
I’m so panicked that I’m numb.
— Grace on Jabber
April 18, 2016
Break the pattern, do a thing.
— Chris Gethard, “For Your Reconsideration,” This American Life
April 17, 2016
I think sticky traps are really special. We should put em up.
April 16, 2016
April 15, 2016
Something else happened that you don’t even know, I was stepping on my own toe and it hurt.
— Lily after I called her out on saying “ow” when the sound of a bump came from an obviously different place
April 14, 2016
One day you’re going to give me a little extra.
— My favorite street book selling guy on 73rd and Broadway
April 13, 2016
— Email from Tumblr
April 12, 2016
I didn’t ask you if you know him, I asked you if you read his book.
— Sid imitating his youngest son as a kid
April 11, 2016
Princeton is discontinuing its sprint football program.
— Princeton University status shared by Matthew Garvey
April 10, 2016
Alright boys, pack it up.
— Lily pretending to be among the bagpipers
April 9, 2016
I hired the swimming guy.
April 8, 2016
You braved the rain.
— Guy from Better Being Underground
April 7, 2016
…into the concrete…
— Andrew Bird saying something stupid
April 6, 2016
— Waiter accidentally giving us a second kelp salad at Jin Ramen
April 5, 2016
I’m just a robot, it’s my batteries.
— Lily on one more ice cream bite after watching Ex Machina
April 4, 2016
Alexa, is there a war?
April 3, 2016
If you’re in a car.
— David Owen, “Where the River Runs Dry,” The New Yorker
April 2, 2016
You come here unannounced on the day my daughter is to be married?
— Mr. Big, Zootopia