That’s why I shouldn’t have seven Etsy shops.
— Grandma’s Ashes, UCB
It’s a growing thing. It’s not like you get to a cliff and you fly or you don’t.
— Jason
I see a blue rhino’s eye… ET phone home… Blue…
— Lily falling asleep
And he’s looking as optimistic as ever.
— Lily on the blue jay sitting in his nest in the tree outside our bathroom window
I’m so panicked that I’m numb.
— Grace on Jabber
Break the pattern, do a thing.
— Chris Gethard, “For Your Reconsideration,” This American Life
I think sticky traps are really special. We should put em up.
— Lily
— Mason
Something else happened that you don’t even know, I was stepping on my own toe and it hurt.
— Lily after I called her out on saying “ow” when the sound of a bump came from an obviously different place
One day you’re going to give me a little extra.
— My favorite street book selling guy on 73rd and Broadway
Hello, truthdeleste
— Email from Tumblr
I didn’t ask you if you know him, I asked you if you read his book.
— Sid imitating his youngest son as a kid
Princeton is discontinuing its sprint football program.
— Princeton University status shared by Matthew Garvey
Alright boys, pack it up.
— Lily pretending to be among the bagpipers
I hired the swimming guy.
— Ken
You braved the rain.
— Guy from Better Being Underground
…into the concrete…
— Andrew Bird saying something stupid
Seaweed salad.
— Waiter accidentally giving us a second kelp salad at Jin Ramen
I’m just a robot, it’s my batteries.
— Lily on one more ice cream bite after watching Ex Machina
Alexa, is there a war?
— Lily