Fight, and you may die.
— William Wallace
Sumo wakes up in the morning.
Flea Fly.
— Joe Bolling
I had qualified for the recitation period with “The Highwayman.”
— Sidney Offit, Memoir of a Bookie’s Son
Cocoa Puffs.
If I had a gun I’d let the hammer down.
— Doc Watson, “The Train That Carried My Girl from Town”
How do you prepare your vegetables?
— Man on Camel’s Hump
A lot of foot landscaping going on here.
— K-Town
Constrictor hitch.
What I’m doin’ doesn’t have any history.
— K-Town
— Toad, Mario Kart
Goat cheese yogurt.
It is not only the final form which is esthetically very pleasing.
Berrocal Mini-David I
Which is like betting a dollar on The Price Is Right, you’re technically allowed to do it, but you know, fuck you.
— John Oliver, “Predatory Lending,” Last Week Tonight with John Oliver
Frozen chai.
Maybe they’ve backfired.
— Dayton on opaqueness of lab information after animal rights lab raids.
I say that home is where I hang my hat.
— Johnny Cash, “Sing A Travelin’ Song”
In our desperate quest to create happy kids, we may be assuming the wrong world burden. It strikes me as a better goal… to focus on making productive kids, and moral kids, and to simply hope that happiness will come to them by virtue of the good that they do, and their accomplishments, and the love that they feel from us.
— Jennifer Senior, “Why is Parenthood Filled With So Much Anxiety?,” TED Radio Hour