The hundredth is as fresh, as absurd, and as thought provoking as the first…. big time publisher…. big time cuttlefish…. poetry bag… grocery bag…
— Oliver Sacks on mishearings, “Oliver Sacks: A Journey From Where to Where,” Radiolab
Ryan has, however, found comfort in torturing Boehner: The speaker inherited his predecessor’s security detail, and whereas Boehner demanded they be freshly shaven every day, Ryan let them grow unruly beards—pictures of which are often texted to their former boss, code name “Tan Man.”
— Tim Alberta, “John Boehner Unchained,” POLITICO via “Drunk John Boehner Unloads on Conservatives, Lets Slip Private Conversations with George W. Bush About Paul Ryan’s Incapabilities,” Breitbart
— price of Nose Peak
These are my two hookers.
— Mason on the two hooks on either side of a small bungee cord
Hey, let’s laugh.
— Mason
What happened?
— Mason on art
100 acres.
— Phi
Socialist rent.
— Abby Kelly
It seemed like any occasion, or no occasion at all, was reason for a fiesta.
— Narrator “John Steinbeck,” Spirit of Monterey Wax Museum
Isabella, I hope you get an A in your class.
— Maître d' of The Sardine Factory on the phone describing restaurant operations to Isabella
For regulars.
— Waitress at Joe’s in Santa Barbara on shot glasses in display cases with plaques underneath
Why are you so proud of yourself?
— Mason to Steph (both on FaceTime)
So I took that to mean I could order a new one every 30 days.
— Matt on Capital One saying to select a photo you like because you can’t change it for 30 days
Reverse that.
— Brad Pitt, Ocean’s Eleven
People get tired by the repetition of their own problems.
— Sid on therapy
Seeing pigeons with very few toes walking down the street with no problem gives me hope
You don’t need all your toes
Just keep at it
Ya know
— series of texts from Lily
One of the things we hear all the time is how great it is to run on grass. So we just said what if you actually married fake grass on the bottom of your shoe, and its, its not a real shoe.
— John Hoke, “How Nike Designs for an N.B.A. Athlete,” video, The New York Times
Maybe we’ll just eat at home.
— Lily
I’ve just got a plate of crackers and cheese and I’m going to go over there to eat it. Do you want to join us.
— Patrick (Judy’s great work friend)
Sand up, Stand up. Stand up and give us a speech.
— Sid to himself after a round of “Happy Birthday”